Father's Day 2006

It is Father's Day in the year of our Lord 2006.

I sit at my computer in my "pajamas" typing this after reviewing a remix of Hyperactive by Thomas Dolby that I acquired last night and ponder the day's events.

My oldest daughter will come home from work at 12:10pm and quickly change, so we can then pickup my parents at 12:30pm and travel to the News-Journal Center Theater in Daytona Beach and see Jesus Christ Superstar on stage (our subscription starts today for the summer session, and it just so happens that the dates I was able to work the tickets out for included this production on Father's Day - no relevance, it just happened that way).

We'll then go to an early dinner (I'm thinking Fazoli's right now for simplicity, but am not sure yet; my dad may have a "want" that we'll have to address).

Then we'll come back home so my oldest can go back to work.

Suddenly, three of my four children have jobs, which is absolutely, completely, totaly awesome for them and for me. My youngest is enjoying day camp at the Port Orange Parks and Recreation Department (where they go out a different event each day, such as DeLeon Springs, Islands Of Adventure and Skating - I envy him!). To be truthful, that's probably the biggest father's day gift I could receive today -- that the four kids are moving forward, socially and economically. I have two who are also going to be driving on their own pretty soon (one with permit who just needed her own money to show she could take care of the insurance and gas, and another who is just the opposite - she needs to get a permit and then her license). It's sobering to me that they are, indeed, becoming more independent, spending hours (nay, entire days) away from home with friends many days.. but it's jus a part of life.

I plan on taking two (if not all three) of the older children to get their own checking accounts VERY soon (I'm guessing I will be co-signing all of these based on information I have so far, which bugs me, but again, it's part of life) so they can start managing their money on their own (to date, there has been a checking account that their allowance was deposited to, and their paychecks as well, and they had access to a Visa/Debit card with "KIDS" permanent-markered on it, so they could access their money under my supervision). Now they'll be on their own with only my guidance and occasional scrutiny of how they're handling things. My only real concern is a minimum balance and learning to keep their check ledger up-to-date -- I'm sure I'll use an Excel file as I do for all such things personally now -- paper ledgers are so 80's. ;-)

It's truly an exciting and sobering time in my own life, watching the kids get more and more independent. I've already dealt with "co-ed sleep overs", the first boyfriend, the stupid-decision of jumping on someone's hood and then paying for it, the attitudes (ah, the ongoing battle) and had several (but not all of my) sex talks with them in various ways (in my typical, subersive way, many times hiding it behind a friendly chat about this or that). Some of them will read this and begin wondering what exactly I mean. (shrug) I hide very little from them, only the tiny shards of a personal life that I've had post-divorce are really hidden from them -- such personal adventures are limited to really one short event in California last year that rejuvenated me in some ways and kind of made me "distant" in others.

So Father's Day to me this year is a mixed bag. My parents have their tumultuous relationship per the norm (but stick to it to this very day, instead of giving up on it), my former wife is (I assume) enjoying life living with her latest boyfriend (at least it's post-marriage this time) and my kids are moving along in life towards that great adventure called independence. I continue to give thought towards some post-college, no-children avenues I may take. Nothing concrete yet. I'm totally open, and anything I plan could change in a heartbeat. I really do still "want" more children, though it's just "if my partner wanted them also" idea at this point. No big deal either way. I've got the Mighty Four, and they're awesome. I love kids. They make the joylessness of things I used to love doing, but now must do, much more bearable. I've even considered the growing numbers of young and teenaged kids that are pawns of the foster care system... who don't have a real home where they can rely on going every day. That saddens me greatly. A kid should have one home and one family to go to, even after they move on with life. I've been lucky enough to have that when it was needed. My kids will always have that through me.

And then there's grandkids. They could be here a lot sooner than later.

Anyway. Those are my thoughts on Father's Day this year. The important things to me, the "father". The "dad". The big mean ogre. The guy who takes all these pictures and authors DVDs for the band. The man who loves kids.

So, to all you fathers out there, Happy Father's Day. Do what YOU want to do today and enjoy.